A betrayal of trust can cause major heartbreak to an individual, especially if you are the one betrayed. Apart from infidelity causing sometimes irreparable damage to a relationship, it can also cause emotional harm to the individual.
Trust is the foundation of most relationships and marriages. Once that foundation is broken, it is difficult for the two people to go back to trusting each other. For some people, the hurt they go through after their partner has been unfaithful outweighs all the good times in their marriage and this leads to divorce.
However, if everyone were to leave their partner after being unfaithful, then there would have been more broken families than there are today. The decision to stay together after one spouse has had an affair is not an easy one. Both parties are required to be more open and vulnerable with each other than ever before.
Working on the relationship alone as a couple can be difficult, but with the guidance of an infidelity therapist in a workshop, you are more likely to achieve your goal of staying together.
Here are a few steps that you should take as a couple to re-establish trust in your marriage.
First and foremost, the partner who cheated has to be willing to stop the affair immediately. All communication with the extramarital partner has to cease so you can focus on fixing the relationship with your primary partner.
The partner who cheated must also be willing to answer all the questions that their partner has concerning the affair. They should also take responsibility for their actions and be empathetic to their partner. It is also essential to be patient and not expect your spouse to forgive you easily or within the time you want.
Rebuilding trust in a relationship can take years. It can be a long and painful process because some truths can come out during the healing process that can be hurtful to both partners. You can experience heartbreak all over again, but as long as it is truthful, you are on the way to building a stronger relationship.
If you are the one who got cheated on, it is essential not to let rage take over your emotions. It is understandable to be angry, but you have to let that anger go if you want to heal individually and as a couple. It is advisable to seek support from family or an infidelity therapist to help you deal with the anger and pain.
You should also understand that it will take time for the whole truth to come out. Keep asking those questions and talk about how much the affair has hurt you. Be prepared to be blamed by your partner for the affair but don’t let it distract you; focus on fixing the problem at hand, which is the affair.
Beware that it is common for couples to let the affair rule their lives. You should be willing to let the incident go and move forward.