“There is a thin line between love and hate.” People, who lost their soulmates forever, often console themselves with this saying, and even not trying to fight for saving a relationship.
How to save the relationship from a breakup? People keep asking this question more often nowadays. Well, let’s try to sort this out.
The world is developing with huge steps. New technologies, new human needs, the race for big money, lack of time, stress, poor environment – all these factors negatively affect relationships between a man and a woman. Sometimes it is difficult to spend time and pay attention to a loved one who needs that so much.
Lack of time and all those factors above often put the further fate of the family at risk and strong people begin real relationship struggles. The faster the couple realizes that they need to take action in order to save their family, the higher the chance of saving their marriage.
It’s hardly possible to meet a couple that doesn’t have any conflict. Even if the rose and candy stage lasts too long and there are a complete peace and harmony atmosphere in the relationships, all small domestic conflicts will appear immediately as soon as the couple decides to live together. At first, the partners try to ignore them. After all, each person assumes his own habits and his own characteristics. And it takes some time to “get used to” each other. But some while this time when man and woman come to an agreement never comes to break up happens in relationships.
Nowadays finding your soulmate is a big success. Moreover, to meet a person with whom you likely would spend your whole life until the last is compared with fantastic fiction.
So where to look for your love, if there is no specific place!? It used to be an expression that you need to find your soul mate in the library. Today the entire library of the world is your phone, tablet or laptop. But seriously, where to meet your destiny? Parks, clubs, meeting at the store by chance, public transport or dating sites? Everyone chooses his own path and fate.
In the development of technologies there are also great and certain advantages, which consist in the fact that now you can search for your own half not only at the local place, the place where you live but also far beyond its borders. A long time ago it was considered unacceptable and shameful if a girl met a man from another settlement (village, town, etc.). But today there are no limits and boundaries for love! Social networks, dating sites, online chat – all this makes dating much easier. Millions of people around the world get to know each other online and today it is as usual as to go and buy milk at the store, for example.
We all watched a lot of classic movies about big and eternal love. How the heroes loved each other and, in spite of all the trials they had to overcome, they still stayed together and forever in heaven and on earth. Many touching scenes make the viewer laugh and cry from the received emotions while reviewing the same film several times.
The difference is that in the movie the roles are played by actors according to a pre-written scenario, but in real life, we are the scenarists of our own destiny. And if it will be successful or failed relationships depends only on our actions.
Nowadays, there are many courses organized by dubious psychologists who, for your money, of course, are ready to teach you how to love, believe in yourself and fight for saving a relationship with your partner. But I’ll repeat once again: only we are the masters of our own destiny!
We often hear the advice from friends and “experts” about the need of taking a break in a relationship in order to sort things out. First of all, let’s try to understand the main reasons why there is a break up in relationships. There are a lot of classifications and they all seem to be different, but, in my opinion, there are several basic reasons for that.
The main reasons for break up in relationships:
Routine, domestic problems
Imagine a couple who have lived together for several years. They forgot the taste of tender kisses, they used to give each other in the morning. He forgot when he bought flowers for her the last time. She forgot when she genuinely laughed with happiness. Their whole life consists of work on weekdays, and what they do on weekends is shopping in the store, cleaning and cooking food for the next week. In such cases, it seems your relationship falling apart even because of the petty everyday quarrel. For example, Ukrainian girls dealing with this problem in their own way. Ukrainian women have natural vitality, optimism, and great willpower. Their power is in patience, in the ability to forgive, in the struggle for their survival and their families. Almost every married couple is confronted with this routine, and the success of family relationships depends only on the man’s and woman’s attitude to it.
Using physical force against a partner
If in the family the conversation turned into assault, then it is difficult to call such relationships between the man and the woman a family. As usual, a man is always stronger and at the moment of moral repression by his woman and, in addition, a broken nervous system, a man shows his superiority over a woman by force, like animal instincts. And how to fix a broken relationship with your couple after such acts. That is not an easy task. And now the question is if it is worth it. Of course, now women do not accept such men’s behavior and marriage just breaks up, but a couple of decades ago there was a common saying “If he beats me, that means he loves me”. And as you know sayings are usually made from life examples.
For us, cheating is the result of physical intimate contact with one of the partners of the couple with another person. The reasons for that are different: the partner is not satisfied, the psychological disorder, the partner’s suspicion in cheating, and so on. After such actions, couples usually break up their relationships, but how to get back together after a break up naturally because of cheating? A lot of people have many opinions regarding that question. For some people, this is a lesson and an impulse to change themselves, and someone decides to commit suicide after the betrayal of his partner. We used to think that most men cheat on women, but conducted in different countries surveys and statistics in recent years suggest the opposite. But the physical cheating is not much worse for relationships than the emotional one. Let’s highlight it in a separate paragraph.
If you cheated for the sake of a variety of sexual experiences, the relationships may be still saved, but if there is an emotional addiction to a person with whom you had an intimate relationship, then I guess, it is time to end such relations with your couple. The first question people ask when they find out about a partner’s cheating is: “Do you love him/her?”. Because of the emotional connection, not the physical one is the main for relationships, and if it is lost, then such relationships can no longer exist. At this moment, you do not know what to say when someone breaks up with you, especially if that someone is your closest person.
Anyway, all the reasons for the break up in relations are interrelated. Of course, every married couple dreams of a happy and carefree life filled only with rest on the paradise islands and the absence of problems. But the reality is different, we have to go through a lot of things to discover and understand the true beauty of human life, with all its ups and downs, which our fate gives us.
It is pointless to be afraid that any of the reasons will appear one day. It is also useless to dwell on a probable problem and try to control relations 100%. You need to feel your partner, you need to understand his essence, to love him as you would like him to love you. It is necessary to be opened for him completely, without hiding and keeping secrets. You need to be honest with each other, be a support for each other, do not be sad about trifles and enjoy every day that you spent together. Present gifts, make surprises for your couple. It does not have to be expensive and luxurious things, it is often enough just attention and coffee in bed, a bouquet of wildflowers and a romantic date under the moon.
If, nevertheless, your life decreed in this way and your couple broke up, then do not despair. Don’t hide your emotions, don’t be afraid that someone will understand you wrong. If you want to cry – cry if you want to scream – scream if you want to sing – sing! Do not restrain yourself! All these desires indicate that you are a person with the deep soul and you cared about that the person with whom you broke up. You can even go alone to the cinema, enjoy the hobby that you left for your loved one to give him more time, read your favorite book again, try to learn something new for yourself. Everything you will do will help you to get better, clean your mind, your thoughts and give a new impulse to live. Believe in yourself! Start living again!
And one day it will be time for talking to the ex after a breakup. Everyone is so afraid of that conversation, but after that, you will understand how damn wrong you were! Life is full of bright colors, you only need to learn how to see them among gray and dark shades! Love each other and be loved! Be open to communication. Give happiness to your sweetheart, make her smile! Have fun! And now after reading this article make some little but effective surprise for your love! Good luck!